time to redo. Not a New Year's revolution. Not a crisis. Just different. It's easier to communicate my thoughts in English, they are not bound by the conclusiveness of a language that I don't know every nook and cranny of. I need the precision that English affords but the ambiguity it leaves in its wake (see this doesn't make any real sense now does it :). However, I am aware that I lack the ability or rather motivation to remain consistent in the blogosphere. I am not keen on projects that lack that end-goal, such as the life of a musician or a strict diet, something one must always be thoughtful of. Life should be more spontaneous and joy should come from the doing, rather than the practical drudgery that accompanies doing the same thing all the time.
I am not nor have I really ever been normal. That is to say, who has? What is normal. The internet, in its infinite wisdom defines normal as "conforming with or constituting a norm or standard or level or type or social norm; not abnormal;" Society defines the norms with fashion and whatnot and one goes through life knowing what the 'standard' is for oneself be it defined in terms of sex or background or whatever. This tells me that I should be feminine and (here I get this 'oh, know' feeling that this will be a politically correct/incorrect blog about feminism or something-when really it is just one long uninterrupted ramble). But now I have been interrupted. My roommate just got back in. So off for now.
Yes Rachel! life is meant to be joyful. We separate ourselves from joy by choice. Life and the universe is about beng natural, not normal. There is nothing about any of us that is not just right until we complicate everything with subconscious illusions of malaise. We begin to free ouselves when we recognize that we already have everything inside us and outside us to be who we are, just like Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz who never needed the wizard to help her get home. She had the power all along: "There's No Place Like Home." We all have have the abiliy to enjoy life and be in the moment and to integrate the jungian like masculine and feminine archtypes we all have within, male and female alike, in order to make us all whole. When we clear out the junk we all seem to take into our subconscious minds from our families, friends, society culture and a kind of collective unconscious we become free from resistance and free to be who we are naturally. We just need to get rid of all the garbage we've been accumulating inside to free ourselves and our energy. Normal is not natural. Natural is normal.
ReplyDeleteThe Big M